Forget the “sexy witch” and “Playboy Bunny” kit this year – that’s just stale (*womp womp). The best Halloween costumes ideas usually stem from what’s happening in the world of pop culture (i.e. blockbuster movies, celebrities, fashion trends and people in the news). It’s safe to say there’ll be a barrage of Michael Jacksons and Kanyes on the streets this year and, thanks to New York Magazine’s The Cut and this atrocious wig, I also predict a severe overdose of Gaga.
With only a few days left until the Halloween festivities begin, some of you FabFrug divas and divos may be concerned that you’ll have to spend a bundle on some pre-packaged kit at Ricky’s in order to make a statement. But, as my sister from another mister Frugal Kat proclaimed, “Real frugalistas shop their closets for Halloween” (Amen).
Luckily for you there’s a world of celebrities and reality show stars (aside from the obvious) just waiting to be made fun of and recreating their looks can be as simple as excavating a too-tight dress or washed out t-shirt out of your storage boxes.
Eight is too many
Hot Mess
Jon and Kate Gosselin have tortured us all year long with their unnecessary presence among the pages of every magazine and newspaper. Kate seems to think that hairstyle of hers makes some kind of fashion statement. I think its sole purpose should be to incite laughter because that ish is a hot scary mess. That said, her signature do is now available in wig form for only $12.99 at BestCostumes.com. To complete the look, I recommend a pair of Crocs or rubber flip-flops, khaki capris and a cheap polo-style shirt (emphasis on cheap…think Kmart).
Be Tardy for the Party
So, I was browsing wigs online and came across this Discorama Mama do, which was oddly reminiscent of one miss Kim “I lurvvv you Papaaaaa…Pappaaa thank youuuuu” Zolciak from Atlanta’s Real Housewives. I see it working well with the tightest, shortest, cant-really-fit-you-anymore-but-the-zip-goes-all-the-way-up-so-hey! dress you can find and an excess of tacky, fake bling (think gold-plated jewelry with fake diamond studs à la Kimora Lee Simmons/Baby Phat). Platform heels, a glass of cheap chardonnay and a cigarette are musts here.
Trend-Whore
This was definitely a year of unforgettable fashion trends. In the Spring/Summer season we saw the one-shoulder top, torn jeans, draped skirts, nautical patterns/colors and statement accessories reign supreme, while the fall season has seen an onslaught of over-the-knee boots, military wear and boyfriend apparel (boyfriend blazer, boyfriend jeans, etc.).
If you already have most of these items lying around your closet anyway, why not just wear them all at once and call yourself a trend-whore? I’m envisioning torn patterned leggings with over-the-knee boots (or severe platform heels) under a tulip skirt, one-shoulder blouse and boyfriend blazer along with neon yellow nail polish, chunky 80s-inspired jewelry and a stream of blue mascara running down your cheeks. Throw in some matte red lipstick for good measure. That’s enough to scare any fashionista!
Sexy Werewolf à la Taylor Lautner
You thought I wouldn’t have anything for the dudes, didn’t you? Well this costume is as simple as it gets.
Taylor Lautner summonsed the inner cougar from within every woman this side of the Atlantic when he put his chiseled abs, dreamy eyes and beefy biceps on display in New Moon. Yessiree. If you have an equally rock-hard body, then go find your oldest pair of jeans and cut the legs off just above the knees and throw on your gym sneakers. Be sure to give the hair a good gellin’ to capture the sleek, wet look. A very important element of this costume is the tattoo on this sexy werewolf’s shoulder. I haven’t found a close enough shot of it to show you, but I do know it’s round, so for God’s sake just draw and damn circle on your shoulder with a permanent black marker and fill that bad boy in with scribbles. Everyone will be drunk anyway so no one will notice the mediocre artwork.
Polygamist Sister-Wife
Trials will begin in Eldorado, Texas this week for the 12 men alleged to have married multiple under-aged girls on the Yearning for Zion ranch. The story is so intriguing that even Oprah paid the ranch a visit earlier this year to see how the residents live. Of course, much of the media were more concerned with the deplorable fashions these women were donning than the fact that the men on the ranch were engaging in bigamy. I for one don’t blame them. French braids? Seriously? And we’re talking worse than the ones in those Hairdini infomercials…these are French braids on steroids. I won’t event comment on the clothes, I’ll just leave you with the image below. You are but a visit to the thrift store and a French braid away (see Oprah’s sister-wife hair braid “how-to” video) from recreating the polygamist-fabness for Halloween! *Kudos to my homey Elise for this idea!
