Halloween Haute

Forget the “sexy witch” and “Playboy Bunny” kit this year – that’s just stale (*womp womp). The best Halloween costumes ideas usually stem from what’s happening in the world of pop culture (i.e. blockbuster movies, celebrities, fashion trends and people in the news). It’s safe to say there’ll be a barrage of Michael Jacksons and Kanyes on the streets this year and, thanks to New York Magazine’s The Cut and this atrocious wig, I also predict a severe overdose of Gaga.

With only a few days left until the Halloween festivities begin, some of you FabFrug divas and divos may be concerned that you’ll have to spend a bundle on some pre-packaged kit at Ricky’s in order to make a statement. But, as my sister from another mister Frugal Kat proclaimed, “Real frugalistas shop their closets for Halloween” (Amen).

Luckily for you there’s a world of celebrities and reality show stars (aside from the obvious) just waiting to be made fun of and recreating their looks can be as simple as excavating a too-tight dress or washed out t-shirt out of your storage boxes.

Eight is too many

Hot Mess

Jon and Kate Gosselin have tortured us all year long with their unnecessary presence among the pages of every magazine and newspaper. Kate seems to think that hairstyle of hers makes some kind of fashion statement. I think its sole purpose should be to incite laughter because that ish is a hot scary mess. That said, her signature do is now available in wig form for only $12.99 at BestCostumes.com. To complete the look, I recommend a pair of Crocs or rubber flip-flops, khaki capris and a cheap polo-style shirt (emphasis on cheap…think Kmart).

Be Tardy for the Party

So, I was browsing wigs online and came across this Discorama Mama do, which was oddly reminiscent of one miss Kim “I lurvvv you Papaaaaa…Pappaaa thank youuuuu” Zolciak from Atlanta’s Real Housewives. I see it working well with the tightest, shortest, cant-really-fit-you-anymore-but-the-zip-goes-all-the-way-up-so-hey! dress you can find and an excess of tacky, fake bling (think gold-plated jewelry with fake diamond studs à la Kimora Lee Simmons/Baby Phat). Platform heels, a glass of cheap chardonnay and a cigarette are musts here.

Trend-Whore

This was definitely a year of unforgettable fashion trends. In the Spring/Summer season we saw the one-shoulder top, torn jeans, draped skirts, nautical patterns/colors and statement accessories reign supreme, while the fall season has seen an onslaught of over-the-knee boots, military wear and boyfriend apparel (boyfriend blazer, boyfriend jeans, etc.).

If you already have most of these items lying around your closet anyway, why not just wear them all at once and call yourself a trend-whore? I’m envisioning torn patterned leggings with over-the-knee boots (or severe platform heels) under a tulip skirt, one-shoulder blouse and boyfriend blazer along with neon yellow nail polish, chunky 80s-inspired jewelry and a stream of blue mascara running down your cheeks. Throw in some matte red lipstick for good measure. That’s enough to scare any fashionista!

Sexy Werewolf à la Taylor Lautner

You thought I wouldn’t have anything for the dudes, didn’t you? Well this costume is as simple as it gets.

Taylor Lautner summonsed the inner cougar from within every woman this side of the Atlantic when he put his chiseled abs, dreamy eyes and beefy biceps on display in New Moon. Yessiree. If you have an equally rock-hard body, then go find your oldest pair of jeans and cut the legs off just above the knees and throw on your gym sneakers. Be sure to give the hair a good gellin’ to capture the sleek, wet look. A very important element of this costume is the tattoo on this sexy werewolf’s shoulder. I haven’t found a close enough shot of it to show you, but I do know it’s round, so for God’s sake just draw and damn circle on your shoulder with a permanent black marker and fill that bad boy in with scribbles. Everyone will be drunk anyway so no one will notice the mediocre artwork.

Polygamist Sister-Wife

Trials will begin in Eldorado, Texas this week for the 12 men alleged to have married multiple under-aged girls on the Yearning for Zion ranch.  The story is so intriguing that even Oprah paid the ranch a visit earlier this year to see how the residents live.  Of course, much of the media were more concerned with the deplorable fashions these women were donning than the fact that the men on the ranch were engaging in bigamy. I for one don’t blame them. French braids? Seriously? And we’re talking worse than the ones in those Hairdini infomercials…these are French braids on steroids. I won’t event comment on the clothes, I’ll just leave you with the image below. You are but a visit to the thrift store and a French braid away (see Oprah’s sister-wife hair braid “how-to” video) from recreating the polygamist-fabness for Halloween! *Kudos to my homey Elise for this idea!

Fall Foodage Event Reviews

Courtest www.Nextup.Wordpress.com

So, my starting line-up of fall culinary events was, overall, a hit. That sheep’s cheese tasting hosted by The Joy of Cheese was utter delight! A blush-colored hombre by the name of Enanzo Rosado warmed my heart and caressed my soul (yeah I’m about to have this stuff special-ordered…and I don’t even usually like Rosé!). Definitely check out the list of October’s events, which are all about local and sustainable cheeses and wines. Prices for the events range from $25-40. “The Joy of Cheese” gets the official Frugal Andy seal of approval!

Le Fooding D’Amour (night #2) was…*meh*….the food was great, the event just wasn’t quite what I expected. The lines at each chef’s stand were badonkadonks from beginning to end. So the relaxed, social vibe I anticipated didn’t develop until much later in the night. Mind you, it was pretty cool to see Daniel Boulud in the flesh fussing over his sous chefs’ work and engaging in witty banter with patrons. But waiting in line for 25 mins before I even recognized the outline of his charmigly square head? Not so much. Even less appealing was the melancholic, Beatles-esque ballads that were blasting through the speakers for the first 90 minutes of the night while the belly dancer at Daniel’s tent girated to her own beat, both to complement his Moroccan-themed dish and to keep herself warm. For the first half of the night, these awkward elements fashioned an ambiance more reminiscent of a funeral wake than a fabulous food festival! Nevertheless, the music selection eventually improved and the Belvy and Veuve began to take hold of most patrons. Besides, it was great to have experienced the first LeYummy in NYC, especially because the proceeds supported a good cause (Action Against Hunger). For a more detailed, pretty nail-on-the-head review, check out The Local. (*Editor’s note: the consensus in the ice-cream line was that everyone was willing to wait only because (1) all the other booths had shut down and (2) these foodies paid their good money and were on an all-you-can-eat mission, refusing to leave until they tried EVERYTHING at least once. All that “the ice cream is just that good” stuff is bollucks! It was good, but I didn’t die over it. Maybe next time they’ll have more than one girl scooping tempered ice cream for hundreds of patrons!!!)

Now that I’ve sweetened up your chops for more grub…look out for the next line-up of affordable culinary experiences to be had this fall, before Jack Frost takes a bite outta your a$$.

Penny Wise, Pound Foolish: How Not to Spend Your Rent Money During Fashion’s Night Out

Everyone and their mama has heard about Fashion’s Night Out by now, so I’m sure I need not get into detail about the fabulousness that will engulf the streets of Manhattan during the largest global shopping event in history this Thursday evening. As excited as you may be that hundreds of the city’s clothing and accessories retailers are keeping their doors open until 11 p.m., your wallet is, at present, sitting in your purse with its tail between its legs, terrified of the potential damage that you may impose upon it in T-minus-36 hours.

There are fashionistas far and wide ready to forfeit their ConEd dues and go without heat through the winter so they can rip the runways of their offices, schools and neighborhood sidewalks in the most pricey one-of-a-kind designer threads in the Fall. But to those who want to attain FabFrug nirvana while enriching their wardrobes and indulging in top-notch spa treatments wisely, I implore you to instead seek enlightenment by first focusing your energies and interests on the free merchandise, salon services and heavily discounted goods being offered at said stores before allowing thyself to contemplate larger purchases. You’ll have a tamer, less ravenous appetite for “stuff” this way. Your wallet will thank you later.

Need a little help developing a budget-friendly FNO plan of action? The Cut offers a comprehensive list of in-store events suitable for the “recession-savvy shoppers amongst us” in A Frugal Guide to Fashion’s Night Out. A few of my personal top picks that made The Cut include:

Gucci
725 Fifth Ave., at 56th St. (212-826-2600)
More than 100 retailers are selling the Fashion’s Night Out T-shirt tonight at Vogue’s “suggested retail price” of $35 — Gucci is the only one giving them away for free to all who attend. We’re betting supplies will run out quick, so stop off early (and sample a few Gucci chocolates while you’re there).
Savings: $35, the retail price of an official Fashion’s Night Out T-shirt .

Burberry
131 Spring St., nr. Greene St. (212-925-9300)
Enter Burberry’s drawing to win a classic trench. Brit model Lily Donaldson D.J.’s, and Champagne and canapés will be served. Sure, it’s a long shot, but a $1,300 jacket would definitely curb our pouting over the approaching chilly, rainy weather.
(Potential) Savings: $1,295, the price of a classic trench at Burberry.

Saks Fifth Avenue
611 Fifth Ave., at 50th St. (212-753-4000)
Fulfill your latent celebrity fantasy and strut down the red carpet, which leads the way to the store’s Fifth Avenue entrance. Donna Karan, Carolina Herrera, Peter Som, and other design idols will be mingling with shoppers. But the real deals are found in the beauty section, where there will be more than 7,000 cosmetics giveaways from Estée Lauder, Frederic Fekkai, Laura Mercier, and Tom Ford. You can also take advantage of complimentary brow-shaping services, while guys receive free clean-ups at John Allan’s men’s salon.
Savings: $40, for brow shaping and beauty swag.

Tory Burch
257 Elizabeth St., nr. Prince St.; (212-334-3000)
Across the street, La Esquina is barbecuing (paired with Champagne — because it’s Fashion Week, and Champagne goes with everything).
Savings: $10, cost of two steak tacos at La Esquina.

Le Labo
233 Elizabeth St., nr. Prince St. (212-219-2230)
Browse the sweet-smelling wares at this Nolita perfumerie and receive a five-milliliter bottle of one of the scents from Le Labo’s collection, ranging from rose to the so-hot-right-now patchouli.
Savings: $17, the price of a five-milliliter “discovery-size” bottle.

Space.NK
99 Greene St., nr. Spring St. (212-941-4200)
Pick up a gift bag full of samples from Eve Lom, Nuxe, and Space.NK Laughter fragrance. Plus, complimentary face masks and mini-facials, if you’re ready to call it a night at this point.
Savings: $20 in beauty swag.

Chanel
139 Spring St., at Wooster St. (212-334-0055)
Belly up to the nail bar for a free manicure in Jade, Chanel’s new limited-edition polish (the same pale, pistachio-green hue that we lusted after on the runway). If you run into buzz-killing lines, head over to Tracy Reese (641 Hudson St., nr. Gansevoort; 212-807-0505), where Sally Hansen manicurists will be offering complimentary nail services. (They’re also serving drinks like the “Frocktail” and the “Plentini,” which we’re betting are pink.)
Savings: $25, the price of a Chanel polish manicure at Wei Lang Spa nearby.

Anna Sui for Target Pop-up
54 Crosby St., nr. Spring St. (no phone)
Get first dibs on the Gossip Girl–inspired Anna Sui for Target collection in this three-day pop-up shop. Consider it your chance to scoop up the affordable Blair and Serena dresses (prices range from $19.99 to $149) before they inevitably sell out.
Savings: $400 or more, off the price of an Anna Sui collection dress.

Pure Yoga
203 E. 86th St., nr. Third Ave. (212-360-1888)
Scope out trunk shows for various athletic brands and pick up a free unlimited, weeklong yoga pass. Take a break from the gym to practice at any (or all) of Pure’s twenty different yoga classes.
Savings: $170, the price of a weeklong trial pass.

There are news stores being added to the lineup each day, so be sure to stay in-the-know by following Fashion’s Night Out New York (@FNOnyc) on Twitter.

The NY Minute: Club Hoppin’ and Celeb Spottin’ with Troy Gordon

“The New York Minute” profiles people in the City who provide resources and services that help exponentially increase your fabulousness without having an inverse effect on your bank accounts.

It’s recently dawned on many of you ladies that the summer’s almost over and you haven’t gone out nearly as much as you should have (some thanks to your fiscal cut-backs, but more thanks to the monsoon-like showers we’ve been having…btw, wtf?). Time to cram three months’ worth of nightlife into three weeks! Afraid you’ll break Fabulously Frugal Guide to Sexy Savings Rule #2 in the process? Fear not. Troy Gordon is at your service.

Troy@Hotel Gansevoort

The Trinidad native and former Wall Street rookie infiltrated the meatpacking district’s club circuit after graduating from Fordham University and never looked back. Now, you can find him at any combination of 1Oak, Greenhouse, M2, Kiss + Fly, Marquee and the Gansevoort (to name JUST a few) on any given night (and I do mean ANY given night – this man does not sleep).  With several club openings, re-openings and renovations slated to take place in the meatpacking district this Fall, who knows where he’ll end up next.

Unlike other elusive club promoters, Troy wants to spread the love. He does so on his blog, TheGordonBrief.com, where his stories of encounters with super-celebs and buxom babes give you the Perez-style juice from NYC’s most popular nightclubs. He invites anyone (and by anyone he means guys willing to buy bottles and attractive girls) to hit him up for a hook up at the door and chances are (if you’re dressed for the part and have an attitude to match) you’ll skip the line and the cover charge, roll inside with him and hang out at his table all night.

Feeling a little too shy to reach out to a complete stranger? Don’t. Troy loves to meet new people. He also enjoys long walks on the beach and hates capital letters. Here’s a little Q&A with the up-and-coming nightlife concierge extraordinaire:

What makes you a unique club promoter? i dont think there are other promoters out there that are as honest as i am. if i have to tell a girl not to come out with me on a respective night because the crowd music or vibe won’t suit her i will.

What advice would you give to girls and guys who want you to get them into the clubs you promote? always dress well. be polite to the doormen. don’t be rude because that immediately ruins your chances.

Best and worst thing about your job? best thing i would say is meeting a lot of people of importance in different arenas of life. worst thing is dealing with very snobby and impatient people who think they are better than the rest of us and they must get what they want without question without paying a dime for it.

Who’s the biggest celebrity you’ve ever rubbed elbows with? a few. ciara @ M2, chris brown @ marquee, and have been working @ the same venue as pdiddy, kanye west, lil wayne, busta rhymes and many more

Best/Hottest club right now? 1oak, avenue, the gates

Most bridge-and-tunnel, over-hyped club right now? haha I guess M2

Drink of choice? red bull. i dont drink (*Editor’s note: say what???)

Do you ever mix business with pleasure? i guess after dealing with all of my clients’ needs i try to have a dance or two but for the most part i am usually taking care of everyone’s needs and wants like an economist

There. Now you two are well acquainted so go ahead, contact him. Mention Fabulously Frugal NY and he’ll take extra special care of you .

Troy Gordon

Troy@thegordonbrief.com

646.251.5017

’09 Guide to Sexy Savings…Part Deux

So I’m (FINALLY!) ready to reveal the remaining rules of the ’09 Guide to Sexy Savings in my next few posts. I know half the year has gone by already (feels like I blinked in February and up popped August! Damn you 9-5, damn you!), but it’s never too late to turn things around.

So here we go…

Rule #2: Summer Fun Should Not Precede Fall Poverty

Many of us have already fallen pray to what I like to call “NYC Summer Fever.” Once the temperature heats up and the layers of goose down and woolen knits get stripped away, it’s like we all begin to hallucinate that we’re made of money and it’s bar tabs, door covers and cab rides galore.

Luckily this city that never sleeps offers enough affordable activities to keep even the busiest of bodies happy.  Even better is the fact that discounts off many of these already reasonably priced activities can be delivered right to your inbox daily.

Groupon.com has to be just about the most fabulous online coupon venture ever! Once you complete the simple registration process, you’ll receive daily e-alerts with the discount of the day, which includes offers like 56% off wine classes at NY Vintners (pay $20 for a 3-hour “Wine 101,” “Pasta Making and Italian Wines” or other classes) and $19 for a full-day Comfort Bike rental complete with helmet and safety gear (a $39 value). What distinguishes Groupon from other coupon sites is the fact that the discounts and deals aren’t shitty – no cliché tourist attractions or bottom-of-the-rung restaurants and retailers. They’re actually pretty freaking fabulous. Just be sure to take advantage of the discounts soon after they arrive in your inbox as the good deals tend to sell out within a matter of hours. That’s the catch – there are a limited number of coupons available for each deal and once that limit is reached, the sale ends.

Goldstar.com is another site that prides itself on offering discounts to some of the city’s signature (and admittedly slightly more touristy) activities like yacht rides and sunset cruises around Manhattan, comedy shows, theater productions and sporting events. The reality is that sometimes it’s fun to play tourist! Pay only $37.50 for $75 tickets for the widely acclaimed Fuerza Bruta, get a 50% discount off Shecky’s Girls Night Out tickets or receive free admission to a $20 comedy show at EastVille Comedy Club.  Visit the site, sign up and let the freeness begin!

Free Food, Free Films…Does it make you randy baby?

NYCFoodFilmFestival.com

I’m starting to realize that my love of good food runs deeper than even I had ever imagined. What gave it away? Well, after I was done orgasming over this trailer, I frantically began reworking my weekend budget to include an $85 expenditure on a ticket to Sunday night’s “Know Your Mushrooms” film screening and tasting event with Double Crown magician/chef Brad Farmerie at the Astor Center. Watching Daniel Boulud gear up to work his magic on some delicate truffles followed by sexy Chef Marcus Samuelsson focusing intensely on his concoction (don’t judge me) just puts me over the edge.

Luckily, those who are less inspired to squander 85 of their hard earned dollars on an evening dedicated to fungi can instead embark on a FREE culinary expedition on Water Taxi Beach in Long Island City from Monday, June 15 through Friday, June 19 during the 36th annual NYC Food Film Festival.

This food festival concept is a fairly unique one in that the patrons first watch a short food film and then taste dishes starring the lead characters. The Festival actually begins today (June 13) at the Astor Center, with a $35 opening night film and tasting starring BBQ mutton and buttermilk (I’ll pass, thanks. I’ll stick with my $85 mushroom show tomorrow night followed by a week’s worth of freeness).

View the schedule of events to find out more about the free tastings, which will include organic burgers, wild rice from Minnesota, cranberry cocktails, clam pie and more.

ExtraFab: Here’s a sneak peek of one of the short films called “Aquavit – In the Kitchen with Marcus Samuelsson” by George Motz. He can cook for me anytime

JOOSY JOOSY BBQ in BKLYN YARD

It’s that time of year when the smell of charred meat and the sound of music in big open grassy areas become as commonplace as rats in the subway. New Yorkers love themselves a joosy BBQ, but it’s not often that you’ll find one doling out plates of food for only $7 with free entertainment.

Well my pretties, you’ll find it this Saturday at the Hapa Kitchen dinner experience in BKLYN Yard. Multi-cultural Chef duo Akiko Moorman and Cathy Erway will concoct entrées from produce supplied by SangLee farms, while the ever-elusive dessert truck will be serving their sweet bowls of goodness.

What: A full meal for under $10, plus music and good people – Fab!

When: This Saturday, 6-10 p.m.

Where: BKLYN Yard, 400 Carroll St.

Why: Why wouldn’t you?

How: Channel the inner cheapskate, arrive hungry, leave happy

Photo courtesy BKLYN Yard

There is a God…of Wine

If you think roaming New York City on a sunny, warm Saturday afternoon sipping on free wine from one of the best grape-growing regions in Spain sounds titilating, then be prepared to be titilated.

Rioja is hosting its Spring Wine Tour tomorrow. Free wine samples para todo el mundo….Fab!

Thrillist.com, you thrill us!